Thank you so much for the overwhelming response for my last post. I am most touched by the civility of all involved. From thousands of hits on this post I only got one comment that was not positive and it really wasn't terrible. Thank you for sharing it with your friends, thanks for the kind messages and comments. It is always so good to feel supported and find others who understand or are trying to understand your point of view.
To clarify, that post was written mostly to reassure people who may be feeling marginalized within my faith, to let them know that there is room for them and they have friends there. I was in no way trying to use the post to make my religion seem more liberal and mainstream or "normal". Once again, I don't really care what the world at large's take on my religion is. I have no control over what other members of my church do or say and what others are going to take away from that. I can only speak for myself. I believe the gospel of Jesus Christ is perfectly in keeping with many liberal ideals which is why I choose to be liberal. My interpretation of the gospel gives me no other alternative. I do however recognize and that I am among the minority in that interpretation of my faith and that the Mormon culture (rather than gospel) is extremely conservative. I'm not going to try to pretend otherwise.
That said, I think I speak for more Mormons than one realizes when I talk about being a liberal Mormon and today I want to address one misconception (usually from those within my faith) regarding why liberal Mormons like myself choose to be liberal.
There's a popular Mormon blog I read and the author has on several occasions alluded to those of us who take a more liberal stand on things as doing it in order to be "cool". In contrast those who take a more conservative stand are considered by this author to be brave and noble and strong enough to do so even though it is "uncool".
A commenter on my last blog claimed that liberals like me claim to believe what they do in order to stay in favor with "society". Being "liberal" apparently means being "hip" and "cool" and socially acceptable. And really, that's the only reason we believe what we do, because we are so weak minded and immature and insecure that if we aren't getting props from the cool kids, whatever shall we do? Basically, we are accused by some as wanting to have our Mormon cake (I bet it's a jello cake..mmmmm) and eat it too.
Ok first. Let's just look at the logic to this argument shall we? If you are a member of a Mormon community, you can assume that if you choose to be liberal you are going to find yourself to be in the minority. You know, (because people like my Anonymous commenter and the bloggers I reference today and yesterday have all but come out and said it) that you are considered to be weak in the faith, someone who wants to fit in with society more than doing right by God. A feeble and pitiable soul who will sacrifice what they know to be right in order to be considered "cool".
So by being liberal you know, right out of the gate, that others within your own community are judging you and think that you are verging on apostasy. Who consider you a sell-out and your views as dangerous and evil, who may even be concerned about your influence on their children.
Now let me ask you this, if you were so concerned about your image, wouldn't you (particularly if you were a 38 year old mom of 5), be more concerned about fitting in with your Mormon community? About being seen as upstanding and noble and brave and virtuous. As having ethics and integrity?
Wouldn't you be more concerned about being "cool" with them? Despite popular misconceptions about Mormons there are actually plenty of conservative friendly, kind, fun women in our church who have kids the age of my kids and do fun things together. They are dynamic and successful and pretty and fashionable and hip. They are smart and talented and creative and organized. They are athletic and trendsetting. I think they are cool. If I was so worried about being in with the in crowd, wouldn't I work harder to make sure that I had my liberal proclivities well covered just in case I offended them and I (or heaven forbid, my kids) got left out of their cool social scene?
If I was so determined to be "cool" and accepted by the non-Mormon community, that I was willing to cast aside my moral convictions, I assure you that we would not be that pain- in -the- butt family who doesn't want their kids to play sports on a Sunday (do you have any idea how complicated that gets as kids get older and more serious about sports, and how many sacrifices have to be made by teams and coaches to accommodate them?) And that's just one place where our religious convictions make us stick out like sore thumbs, inconveniencing others and being "uncool".
I find it incredibly judgmental and condescending when people dismiss liberals as hipster wannabes. What does "cool" mean anyway? To me someone who is cool is someone who is kind and genuine. I admit that I want my kids to be well-liked. I don't want them to have social problems. I try to teach them (to the best of my ability) how to be socially aware and acceptable. After years and years of trial and much error, after lengthy and careful observation of what makes the popular people popular and cool people cool, after years of learning from my own considerable failures in this department, my best social advice to my kids is this:
People like the people who are genuinely and reliably kind. To be kind is cool. To make others feel good about themselves is attractive. When you recognize and magnify other people's strengths rather than their weaknesses they will want to hang out with you more. People are drawn to people who care about them and are genuinely interested in them. If you demonstrate these qualities you will always have friends you can count on.
I'm pretty sure my kids think I am trying to trick them into being good people by wrapping it in the pretty packaging of popularity, but really and truly, this is my best social advice. I don't have anything more effective to offer them. Something better may be out there, but I don't know what it might be.
I wrote an epic post a couple of elections ago about why I am a liberal Mormon and how I think our faith lends itself more to be liberal than conservative so I won't rehash that here.
Suffice to say that I don't believe what I believe in order to gain popularity in the eyes of "the world". I don't write posts like this to get a ton of hits on my blog. I have a degree in Marketing, I've blogged for years, I have learned a lot about blogging and growing readership over those years. I have had many opportunities to make my blog a much bigger deal than it is, and I guess I have just never been motivated enough to make that happen.
I believe what I believe and I write posts like this because believe it or not, it feels right to me. It is in keeping with the dictates of my conscience. I believe these things because I imagine Jesus Christ embracing them. I share these beliefs because I think that He wants and expects me to. I think He has given me the opportunity, the forum and the ability to talk about these things because He wants people who are in pain to hear them. I believe and share these things because I take my baptismal covenants to mourn with those who mourn and to comfort those who stand in need of comfort, seriously. I believe and share these things because I strive to be a witness of Him at all times, and in all things, and in all places. I fail dismally in my strivings, every day, but that is my goal. I am very proud to be a member of a church bearing his name...the church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter Day Saints. I emphasize the Jesus Christ part because to me, that's what it is all about.
I would be a hypocrite if I did not admit here that I have been guilty of judging those who have conservative beliefs harshly and unkindly at times. Of attributing unChristlike motives to their beliefs. I need to do better with that. I'm trying to. At the end of the day, I believe that heaven will be filled with members of every political party. It will be filled with people who did their best to love one another, to feed his sheep, to take care of the one. To do what they felt was right.
As a liberal Mormon, just like any other Mormon, I am just doing my best, just trying to do what I feel is right. If that makes me cool, then that is an awesome by-product, but it's definitely not the motive.
Giving people the benefit of the doubt is a decision that one rarely regrets. Not judging others is incredibly liberating and it frees up a ton of time and energy to do more good in the world.
Today I am grateful for
1. Tolerance. People who truly want to find common ground and work to create peace in their world, starting in their immediate sphere of influence. I think almost everyone craves a sense of cooperation and camaraderie with those around them. Thank you for the kind and positive feedback on my post earlier today, it has been truly touching and humbling. I have been encouraged by the number of positive posts I have seen today in the midst of the gnashing of teeth and gloating that is par for the course one day post-election.
2. The absence of political ads. Even the Real Housewives seem positively civil in comparison. I don’t think I realized how toxic they were until I found myself physically tensing and bracing myself at the beginning of an ad last night that turned out to be a benign ad for insurance. Hooray for the end of vitriol and lies. In my fondest dreams, the next four years will bring about a change in the way elections are run in the future.
3.Fresh starts. Even if the fresh start is taking a deep breath and saying a quick and urgent prayer after I lose my mind with my kids.
4. There’s this new type of yogurt. It makes me happy. (Caramelized almonds…need I say more?)
5. This. I laughed for a straight 2 minutes over it today. I don’t know…maybe I’m just tired but really…come on now. (I’m cackling right now..)
(thanks pinterest)
Brothers and Sisters,
Today some of us are feeling relieved and joyful. More of us are not. Believe it or not, I take no satisfaction in this. In fact, it pains me. If you are feeling sad, concerned and fearful about the future of our country, I am truly sorry. I hope as I am sure you do, that in time your fears will be allayed as we work together to create solutions and mend the great divide.
If you are angry with me or my fellow Mormons or anyone really, who supported President Obama in this election, I am sorry about that too. If you feel that we are unwise, short-sighted or just plain idiotic, well…so be it. Perhaps we are. Time will tell.
How you feel is your business, I can’t tell you how to feel, I can barely tell myself how to feel.
However. I must on this day and on every day in the future most emphatically implore those of you who do (and by no means, is that every Republican Mormon), to stop implying or even overtly stating to each other, to your children, in social media or at all ever, that those of us, (Latter Day Saint or not), who voted for President Obama are immoral.
You do not know my heart. You do not know the heart of those who voted for President Obama.
Please do not say that we are pro-abortion. No decent human-being is pro-abortion. Being pro-choice is not being pro-abortion. But the truth is, you don’t even know if those who voted for President Obama are pro-choice or not. If you want to know more about my rationale regarding this issue or any other issues, I will refer you to this post.
However this letter today is not about whether or not we agree on the issues. It’s not who is right or wrong, who has a better plan for the economy or a better foreign policy. It’s about an attack on character. Please consider that we have, as I am sure you have, carefully, prayerfully and with great diligence to heeding our personal moral compasses, studied out the issues and chosen what we feel is best. What we feel is most moral. Our church takes a politically neutral stand. I am perfectly confident that if voting for one candidate over another was immoral, our Prophet would not hesitate to tell us so. I trust him. I know that he supports political neutrality. I know that he does not consider one party more righteous than another. I know that prominent members of the church, including at least one late member of the First Presidency are and have been Democrats.
I believe that every person has the right to his or her opinion and has the right to express that opinion. However, I do believe that questioning or even negating my personal morality by virtue of who I choose to vote for, is incredibly judgmental and very, very wrong. To tell your children that those of us who have voted for another candidate are immoral, is very wrong.
I, or one of my fellow Democrats, may well end up being your child’s Primary or Sunday school teacher. Their nursery leader or their Young Women’s or Young Men’s President. Maybe even their Bishop. How will you be able to reconcile to your children my moral bankruptcy because of my political beliefs, with the fact that the Lord finds me worthy to lead and teach them?
I believe we are all good people. I believe we are trying our best. I do not believe that anybody who says these things on facebook or wherever is saying them to hurt me. Not at all. But these things do hurt me. Deeply. They hurt my children. And most importantly, they are untrue.
Please, please think about what you are saying. Again, call me stupid or unwise, naïve, ridiculous, ignorant, blind or uninformed. Truly, this really doesn’t bother me. But please don’t call me immoral. When you are tempted to do that, please think about saying it to me in the hallway at church, or next to me as we take the sacrament. Think about saying this to my kids. When you say these things, please imagine yourself saying them to me or someone else who may have voted for President Obama as we stand face to face in the Temple together.
Please just don’t.
When it comes down to it, we have not been told which candidate will or will not lead us to destruction. You may or may not speculate about prophecies and signs in the last days, and how President Obama may or may not contribute to the hastening of these days.
We have, however been warned very explicitly about contention and dissension within our church. We cannot be united, we cannot feel a sense of trust and love for each other if we are judging each other’s morality. We can and most certainly should (and nobody is a bigger proponent of this than me) have diversity in opinion, politically and otherwise, and again, if you think I am an idiot, well…it’s been proven to be true many, many times before.
Brothers and Sisters, I want to feel comfortable and safe and un-judged at church. I want my kids to feel the same way. I want you and your kids to feel that way too. Let’s be more careful, more sensitive and more thoughtful….all of us. I am far from blameless. If I have offended you in the past, for any reason, (and there is a good chance that I have), I most sincerely apologize. I have a big, loud mouth, I love a good political debate, I am overly opinionated and I can have a quick temper, but in the end like you, like everyone else, I mean well. I’m trying. If you have an issue with me, please let’s talk it out. I don’t think my blanket apology above absolves me from doing that and I want to make things right.
In the end, we are all aiming to hang out in the same place, under the same leadership.
With love and respect,
Kirsty
PS: I am closing comments on this one because it’s not a good forum for debate. None of this, in my opinion is subject to debate, anyway. If you want to respectfully chat to me or email me about any part of this, please feel free. Peace.
(ABCNews.com asked me if they could use this picture! We’re famous! )
1. My kids. They spent all of their day off canvassing in in the cold. When Aaron and I met the boys at the campaign headquarters at 5pm (after they had already been out for hours), they were tired and cold but readily agreed to come with us on a shift to show us the ropes. They pretty much just took over. Aaron and I couldn’t believe how efficient and brave they were. I was really very proud of them. Quote by Benj: MOM! Give me that clipboard so I can figure things out! And get off your dang facebook! This is important! Gracie spent all day out doing the same with friends too. Regardless of how the election goes, I am so proud of them all for getting involved in something outside of themselves and their own little world. And whohooo to the kids who stayed home, totally uncomplainingly, with no dinner so we could do our civic duty.
2.ALL the people who have worked so hard and tirelessly on this election. I admire your unselfishness and dedication so, very much.
3.Facebook. So great to have a virtual election night party in my pajamas. Obsessing all night alone would suck.
4. OHIO! Second time in eight years that it is my favourite state in the nation.
5.Umm….
Today! What a day! It has been an amazing, magical inspiring day. A day that doesn't feel quite real because it really has been so different from any other day I have ever had, it's one of those stand alone days in the history of me.
The day started with all four of my kids snuggled in bed with me, watching for the Obamas to emerge from Blair House. Obama=not so much punctual. Hey! He's just like us, kids!
As we got ready to attend the Inaugural party and I was forced to be away from the TV for whole minutes at a time, in order to make these truly wicked brownies (yet another sublime experience this day), they gave me blow by blow descriptions. Benjamin took it upon himself to draw this and stick it up on the door. I only noticed it when we left the house and it made me smile all the way through me. Indeed it has.
A few people I know have expressed that they don't see what the big deal this day is. That it has been overblown, that we have all been swept away on some sort of media band-wagon and why should this inauguration get any more attention then any other.
Hey, it is a free country, and they have every right to express that opinion. but this is my blog right? So may I please admit, that this has frustrated me? Deeply? HOW can anyone not see what a huge deal this is? It has changed the identity of an entire race not just in this country but across the world, forever. A glass ceiling that has always existed has been shattered. Slavery, bigotry, hatred, segregation, the continuing feelings of isolation, of being on the outside looking in, until today, there has been no real closure on them. Not like this. No black person has ever achieved the highest political office that this country (and arguably the world), has to offer. Don't think this is a big deal? Try being a little black boy who was not allowed in a restaurant to eat dinner with your parents, and watching on this day as a black man and his wife walked into the White House, and took over. This is not ancient history, this is the experience of people not too much older then me. All within one short lifetime! This. Is. Huge. So at first, yes I felt frustrated, even outraged. How could anyone be so insensitive as to claim this was no big deal? I frankly feel that if you are not black you don't really have the right to say how big a deal this is. I'm not black, but trust me, even this white South African girl knows- it's big. It's huge. Look at the faces out on the mall today. This is not just not a fad, this is transformational. It changes everything for these people, and by extension for us all.
Here's some reaction from my fellow South Africans
Now I am not so naive as to think that this fixes everything. Racism is alive and well. African-Americans will continue to be discriminated against by racists. That is a sad reality. But something like this gives the successful 50 year old black man, who was denied admission in that restaurant as a little boy, the man who admits that despite all that he has achieved, he never truly believed this day could ever come, that this thing could ever be achieved, a whole new perspective on what is possible in this world. And it gives a 32 year old white woman a whole new perspective on what is possible too. And speaking just for myself here, that's a big deal.
Tonight, after this glorious day, the outrage, frustration and confusion about this what's the big deal? mind-set has faded to more of a sense of sorrow for those who could not participate in this day with a sense of wonder. Who did not get to watch it with the sense of how truly miraculous and special it has been. There are so few experiences like this in life, this may have been a once in a lifetime moment, what a loss to have missed it! Does that sound condescending? I suppose it depends on where you are coming from when you read it, but please know that I am genuine, I don't think I am better then you are. I just wish everyone could have felt the joy and wonder that so many felt today. You know how it is when you want to share something wonderful you have experienced with everyone else? It's just that. Less of the righteous indignation of earlier, and more of a yearning. It's progress anyway.
But anyway, back to ME. This is all about me after all, and my feelings. My lovely, warm and fuzzy, happy, amazed, sublime, anything is possible and the world is so good, and let's all just cuddle one another, feelings.
We watched the inauguration with others who had worked hard in our community to help make this happen. There was an awesome energy in that old theatre. I am so glad my kids got to be there. Someday when they tell their therapists how awful I was in every single way, I hope that they remember this day, and say, "but I guess there was that one time she was pretty cool and let us stay off school so we could see Obama's inauguration. Yeah, I saw it, you were doing a worksheet? Oh. I'm sorry." Or at least that is my fantasy. Finny was not feeling well and spent most of the time snoozing heavily in my numb arms , I spent most of the time dripping tears on his head. He did not seem to mind. He even slept through all the cheering and clapping. Another miracle in our time.
This blurry shot is the closest I have ever seen Obama to tears, (or that is how I interpreted his expression, there was some sort of strong emotion going on there) walking towards the inauguration stage. I wonder what he was thinking. I truly cannot imagine not having a massive panic attack right about then. You have got to be wired differently to go for this gig, man.
And THEN, THEN! Just as today could not get any more inspiring, I got to see another of my heroes in action. A year ago or so I received a book called The Art of Possibility as a gift just after I was called to a leadership position and was doing a little bit of the freaking out.
The friend who gave it to me has always been an example (and somewhat of an enigma) of serenity and chill-ness to me. So I read it. It was another one of those transformational experiences. The same friend who gifted me the book called me last night to offer me tickets to see the author speak tonight. Well twist my arm. Aaron and I went and...wow. What an evening. It was the most perfect, inspiring, exhilarating, and utterly appropriate ending to this remarkable day. Living within endless possibility. Is there any other way to truly be alive? I think not. If you have a few minutes I would highly recommend tuning in. You won't even have to pay a sitter. (Which would be totally worth it btw)
Did I mention that I loved this day? Well, I really, really did. Here's to many more impossible dreams being fulfilled and infinitely more people inspired. Yay this day!
that we celebrate the man today, whose dream will be so much closer to being fulfilled tomorrow?
Sometimes life is incredibly poetic.
I am so excited.
A couple of months ago, I woke up on a beautiful Fall day. The sky was intensely blue, the sun was shining brightly and the air just vibrated with excitement, possibility and joy. It was a special day.
As I drove home from dropping Finny at school, I knew I could not just go home. I had so much pent up energy and excitement. I turned my car around as I decided I would drop by the Obama campaign office to see if I could be of any more assistance at this late stage.
Nobody in there was resting on their laurels, there was surely no premature celebrating. All systems were full steam ahead. I was enthusiastically welcomed. I took my place at a crowded table in a little back room and grabbed a cell phone and a list. To my right was an old man, a war veteran. To my left was an old man who was gay, across from me, there was a young African-American woman, down the table a little way a middle aged, professional white woman sat. The table next to us was laden with donated food from restaurants and also just individuals who had baked up a batch of muffins to keep everyone going. I imagine they were feeling as I was. They had to do something. They wanted to be a part of this.
We enjoyed an hour or two of camaraderie as we worked our way down the list. Most of the people enthusiastically affirmed that they had already voted. One hard of hearing old man bellowed down the phone that yes, he had already voted, and it was for "the coloured guy". I recounted his response to the table and as we laughed nervously about the very un-PC nature of his comment, it struck me that this was actually something really special. Clearly, here we were seeing a presidential candidate who was being judged by "the content of his character and not by the colour of his skin". That old man was clearly not hip, he was not young, PC, cool or swayed by the media or Hollywood. He was a man who saw another man whom he believed would lead our country well. And he voted for him. A dream was fulfilled.
It was just the most magical day. To be honest, I had never felt a sense of belonging in America until that day. I was always very aware that I was a foreigner. I felt alienated (haha punny) at patriotic events, accepted but always somewhat of an outsider. But that day I belonged.
My hopes represented the hopes of people all over the world. Being South African for once made me feel even more of a kinship for the Americans who were hoping along with me. That night as I saw the footage of Africans celebrating with the unbridled joy that only Africans can celebrate with, I felt such a sense of one-ness, that night we were one world.
As I shared the evening with my sister on the phone in Australia, anxiously waiting as the numbers from each state came in, I felt as though the whole of Australia was rooting for us too (and by all accounts, they were). At one time when my sister had to reluctantly hung up to take a bathroom break, the numbers for Ohio came in, and I knew the deal was sealed. I called her and shrieked the news at her secretary. "OHIO! WE WON OHIO! It's done! It's done!" I was pretty much incoherent, I'm not even sure she knew who I was. "Oh brilliant!" she responded enthusiastically. We were all one world.
I had started that night really quite sick, at 6pm I was lying on the couch, coughing my head off and I sounded "at death's door" according to my sister. But as the hours went on, the adrenaline kicked in and I was dancing, laughing, screaming, running through the house like a lunatic and jumping up and down. My kids were quite bemused. I'm fairly sure they have never seen that sort of performance from me before, *(including the post traumatic stress dance I did that one time I inexplicably set off a mouse trap that I had no idea had been set underneath my kitchen sink, containing a dead mouse. Yes, I don't know how it is possible to set off a trap that had already caught a mouse, but I did, and it got my finger, and much therapy ensued.)
Along with the laughing and the running and the jumping and the screaming was the crying. When I called my dad in South Africa to wake him with the news, I was once again incoherent, hiccoughing through my happy tears. He told me that the radio had woken him up with the words "President Obama". We were one world. The happy crying continued for several days thereafter every time I realized it had not been a dream after all.
That night as Aaron and I sat quietly, almost reverently watching Obama's acceptance, it was not a sense of victory or the brilliant speech we were reveling in. It was the unity, the miraculous unity. The old, the young, the black, the white, the rich, the poor standing literally shoulder to shoulder, faces glowing with hope. Like everyone else, when the camera panned to a weeping Jesse Jackson (who frankly doesn't generally move me) , I like everyone else I'm sure, was undone. In that face, I think we were reminded of the unbelievable struggle and sacrifice of the civil rights movement, and what an unthinkably miraculous moment this was in light of where we had so recently been.
It is my prayer that the sense of global unity will only increase as President Obama takes on a country in chaos. I pray that we will be patient and realistic, but that the sense of hope and optimism will remain. I pray that he will be fortified to deal with all that he will be required to do. I'm not sure if any mere mortal man has ever had so much pressure of so many different varieties placed upon him all at the same time. He will definitely need the help of the Lord. I pray that he will seek it, be worthy of it, and trust it at all times.
And tomorrow, I am hoping that I get that all one world feeling again. Because unity, my friends, is just the coolest, wouldn't you agree?
*Warning: the the following collage contains images of unbridled and at times, unattractive, elation. Viewers are cautioned.
So I have me some thoughts and feelings regarding Prop 8. This post is not about them.
Over the past several days I have observed the protests directed at the Mormon church, (some more vitriolic then others):
and as a Mormon I feel compelled to point out that
1.) Not every Mormon voted for Prop 8. In fact the vast, vast, vast majority of them had absolutely nothing to do with it, so sending them all to hell doesn't seem altogether fair (and is a tad hypocritical no?). And you know what else? Sending those to hell who did vote for it is just silly. Freedom of religion, speech and the democratic process. Hmmm...as far as I see no Mormon violated any of these things. But thanks for all the excuses to type hell. Damn it feels good.
2.) Well...he says it better:
Catholic Bishop Decries Religious Bigotry Against Mormons 11/08/2008 05:15 PM MST
SACRAMENTO - 7 November 2008 - (This news release was issued by the Roman Catholic Diocese of Sacramento) The following statement was released today by Bishop William Weigand, head of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Sacramento and former Bishop of Salt Lake City, in response to attacks on (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) for supporting California’s Proposition 8, defending the traditional definition of marriage:
“Catholics stand in solidarity with our Mormon brothers and sisters in support of traditional marriage — the union of one man and one woman — that has been the major building block of Western Civilization for millennia.
“The ProtectMarriage coalition, which led the successful campaign to pass Proposition 8, was an historic alliance of people from every faith and ethnicity. LDS were included — but so were Catholics and Jews, Evangelicals and Orthodox, African-Americans and Latinos, Asians and Anglos.
“Bigoted attacks on Mormons for the part they played in our coalition are shameful and ignore the reality that Mormon voters were only a small part of the groundswell that supported Proposition 8.
“As the former bishop of the Diocese of Salt Lake City, I can attest to the fact that followers of the Mormon faith are a good and generous people with a long history of commitment to family and giving to community causes.
“I personally decry the bigotry recently exhibited towards the members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — coming from the opponents of Proposition 8, who ironically, have called those of us supporting traditional marriage intolerant.
“I call upon the supporters of same-sex marriage to live by their own words — and to refrain from discrimination against religion and to exercise tolerance for those who differ from them. I call upon them to accept the will of the people of California in the passage of Proposition 8.”
When all is said and done, members of the Mormon church, (not the Church itself) donated a great deal of money towards Prop 8 and were encouraged by church leaders to support the passage of the proposition. In the end only a very tiny percentage of them got to vote, not all of them voted yes, and none of them as far as I am aware, stood with a gun to the head of anyone in a voting booth to make them vote "yes". While there will no doubt always be disappointing exceptions in every group of people, I have no doubt that the vast majority of Mormons were respectful in their campaigning. The process was a democratic one and whether we like it or not, the people have spoken. Most of those people were not Mormon. I would also like to point out the following from a statement given by the Mormon church:
It is disturbing that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is being singled out for speaking up as part of its democratic right in a free election.
Members of the Church in California and millions of others from every faith, ethnicity and political affiliation who voted for Proposition 8 exercised the most sacrosanct and individual rights in the United States — that of free expression and voting.
While those who disagree with our position on Proposition 8 have the right to make their feelings known, it is wrong to target the Church and its sacred places of worship for being part of the democratic process.
Once again, we call on those involved in the debate over same-sex marriage to act in a spirit of mutual respect and civility towards each other. No one on either side of the question should be vilified, harassed or subject to erroneous information.
The church also said this as part of this statement when Proposition 8 passed (my emphasis added)
Such an emotionally charged issue concerning the most personal and cherished aspects of life — family, identity, intimacy and equality — stirs fervent and deep feelings.
Most likely, the election results for these constitutional amendments will not mean an end to the debate over same-sex marriage in this country.
We hope that now and in the future all parties involved in this issue will be well informed and act in a spirit of mutual respect and civility toward those with a different position. No one on any side of the question should be vilified, intimidated, harassed or subject to erroneous information.....
......Allegations of bigotry or persecution made against the Church were and are simply wrong. The Church’s opposition to same-sex marriage neither constitutes nor condones any kind of hostility toward gays and lesbians. Even more, the Church does not object to rights for same-sex couples regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights, so long as these do not infringe on the integrity of the traditional family or the constitutional rights of churches. Yo, I'm back: So we all have the rights to our (sometimes super strong) feelings on this matter. But let's remember that this is America. And if there's one thing American's pride themselves on, it is the right and privilege to vote their conscience. Californians did so. And hatred? Does not solve anything. Ever.
Still with the crying. This morning Finny said, "hey guys do you know why mommy is crying". Then he looked at me and smiled and said, "I don't know". Although he can't articulate it and he can't possibly realize to what extent a true miracle has occurred, I think he senses why. Something unbelievably special has happened, and mommy is very very happy. Not much more then one hundred years ago, the man we now call the President elect could have been a slave. Just 45 years ago Martin Luther King gave a speech about a dream he had.
No matter what your political leanings, I cannot think how anyone could look upon the scene last night in Grant Park, that scene of love, unity, respect, understanding and tolerance, a scene where people of all races stood shoulder to shoulder and embraced each other with faces glowing with the joy of knowing where we have come from and where we are now, and the hope of what that means for the future. I cannot see how anyone can look on a scene like that and not imagine a loving God smiling down on it.
and for anyone who missed it
I have now been a part of two truly historic elections, elections based on almost unimaginable hope for the fruition of an event that few could truly imagine even a generation ago, even a year ago..even yesterday. I could not be more proud of the outcomes. And to quote a line from the classic Notting Hill. It's surreal, but nice. Oh so very nice. Oh Happy Day!
I love you Ohio, thank you so much, I am proud of you. ALL THAT HARD WORK PAID OFF> YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Just a tad thrilled here LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU (and Pennsylvania you too..kisses)
'Twas the night before Election and all through the house Not a tv was silent nor computer nor its mouse
The signs had been placed on the front lawn with care In the hopes that Obama soon would win there
The pumpkins were carved The buttons were pinned We yearn and we hope and we pray for a win
A Socialist? Obama? We know it's not true He just wants more money for me, and for you
And just how will he find all that money to give? Why, he will end a war soon, and more people will live!
No Child Left Behind would get some much needed reform Kids would stop filling in bubble sheets, being forced to perform To some arbitrary standard which did not fill their head With much more then wishing they’d just stayed in bed Now teachers? Wouldn’t that be a hoot? To actually get to teach, less time jumping through hoops?
Want to send your kid to college? Barack has a plan! Help the community out and you’ll score a cool 4 grand to put towards college, and community college is free! Now tell me my friends, how cool would that be?
Moving on to health care reform Help is on its way And not the type that McCain offers where more taxes you will pay Insurance the average "Joe" can afford You’ve got to be sick in the head if you don’t get on board! Most of us will save two thousand five hundred and with no McCain healthcare tax will we be lumbered Preventive care? Obama has it covered There are plenty of diseases which don’t need to be suffered
And have I mentioned? Obama-he’s green! Well not literally But you know what I mean Barack is really most keen On keeping ourair and our water clear and clean
Barack Obama represents hope And if you can’t see what that means, then I guess you’re a dope Hope is something we’re most short of right now It’s also why the rest of the world has been having a cow They think we are morons they think we are dolts Let’s do something to give that notion a jolt. They want him to win as badly as we do With his help our messed up rep would get a big re-do
So many reasons So little time So make very sure that you get yourself in line Early tomorrow . Go ahead and vote Get off of your couch put down that remote
Vote for Obama Do it for your mama Heck do it for yourgrandma Your grandpa too Do it for your kids Do it for YOU
You won’t regret it You’ll feel real proud If Obama wins We’ll be one happy crowd.
Nathan is the big brother I never had. He teases me mercilessly, is often quite insensitive to my fragile ego, and has never given me a compliment without a caveat. He drives me insane quite a bit of the time. I have hit him more then once. But one thing I (or anyone) could never accuse him of would be being passive or ill-informed. Nathan is nothing if not a deep thinker. He's Dr. Nathan in fact, a professor at BGSU. He has lived abroad with his family and has established a global perspective because of that. He is incredibly interested in people, their point of view and how they came to it. He had a Libertarian over to dinner last night. The only thing he is closed minded to is the fact that it is possible that I am not a completely rubbish runner just because I listen to an iPod whilst running and do not run 6 min miles as he does.
Nathan also feels pretty strongly about his duty to improve his community and the world around him. He has taken on re-organizing our local soccer club, despite the fact that it rocked the boat in our community considerably. It was not always fun for him, but he believed in the cause and he believed he had a duty to see it through in order to make our community better and serve the little soccer players within it as best he could. All this to say, Nathan does not talk the talk at the expense of walking the walk. He talks a lot. He also walks a lot (he has spent the last two full days canvassing door to door in a neighbouring community, talking to people and really, honestly seeking to understand them.) He has a lot of faith in the goodness of humanity. He regrets most right now that so many people are so afraid. He does not think elections should be decided on the basis of unfounded, irrational fear. Neither do I.
Ladies and Gentleman, I give you Nathan Richardson.
“Bad poetry is always sincere.” –Oscar Wilde
How many of you in the past month have received a terribly earnest e-mail warning you of the horrors that are to come if one Barack Hussein Obama is elected president?
Me? Plenty. Always from my most well-meaning aunts and fellow congregates at the local chapel. They love me. They wish to save us all from the evils that are to come. I thank them. And I quickly read, delete, and make no reply. They mean well and there´s rarely any point in getting into it with them.
But. . . three days before the general election I have alas decided that enough is enough. To quote some amigos of mine: ¡Basta!
Basta.
Basta, because a touching testimonial from an Iraq veteran does not a war explain, nor an international political dynamic address.
Basta, because an expletive-filled warning from Lee Iacoca about the state of our country´s politics and the threat of a socialist president doesn´t form a single coherent argument. Heck, it isn´t even from Lee Iacoca.
Basta, because Obama is not a Muslim.
Basta, because Obama is not a terrorist.
Basta, because William Ayers is and has been for the last two decades an elementary school education specialist and a distinguished one at that, and the fact that he is appointed in a completely transparent manner by a democratically elected mayor to serve on an advisory board with someone who will someday run for president of the United States does not make that someone a terrorist.
Basta, because the very attempt to stretch that association into a question of who´s-hanging-out-with-whom is absolutely absurd, and probably unethical and immoral.
Basta, because even if Obama were a Muslim, who cares?
Basta, because even if I were a Mormon would I want to marry both your daughters? Or slaughter you the next time you vacationed in Mountain Meadows, Utah.
Basta, because this is America.
Basta, because who cares if his name is Hussein?
Basta, because it´s like fearing an Iraqi whose long-lost American dad happened to name him Bob.
Basta, because your flag and a country music soundtrack in the background may bring tears to my eyes and a flutter to my heart, but it DOESN´T EXPLAIN A THING ABOUT THE COMPLEX ISSUES FACING THIS NATION AND THIS WORLD.
Basta, because Obama isn´t a socialist.
Basta, because McCain himself confessed on national television that Obama is not a socialist.
Basta, because if what George W. Bush did with our country´s banking system last month isn´t as “socialist” as this country has gotten in our lifetime, I don´t know what is.
Basta, because most of us don´t even know what socialism is.
Basta, because if we did, most of us wouldn´t really mind.
Basta, because you too know someone creepy with views that are even repugnant.
Basta, because if the Clinton campaign, the McCain campaign, the RNC, and the world´s media haven´t found out yet just what Obama is hiding, it means that he´s hiding nothing.
Basta, because a vote for Obama is not a vote to slaughter the unborn.
Basta, because that issue, as with a whole host of others, is complex and politically manipulated by both sides.
Basta, because politics is what politics is and it requires compromise and deals, and money, and friends, and if that bothers you then maybe you´d be better off living in a monarchy or a dictatorship, because democracies or democratic Republics (whatever) require POLITICS.
And finally, basta, basta, y basta, because forwarding on fear-mongering e-mails does a terrible disservice to the democratic process. Indeed, dare I say that spreading such silliness as if it were somehow important is downright unpatriotic? Well, if patriotism is actually a productive attitude and activity towards the current and future well-being of one´s country (as opposed to some emotional nostalgia for flags, songs, and heroes past), then I do dare.
So, this election season, how about we base our vote in reality. How about we open our eyes, ears, mind, and heart to what the candidates actually have to say? How about we let them speak for themselves and judge accordingly? How about we judge the candidates on the content of their character and ideas, and not on the color of their skin, the strangeness of their name, or the rumors that others spread about them?
Wouldn´t that be true, honest patriotism? Wouldn´t that be a real love of country?
For the next three days, can´t we all just make a little effort to lift ourselves from the internet e-mail gutter? Can´t we?
But enough with the rhetorical questions. Basta. No more inquiries. Just commands.
So here goes: In the next three days, whatever your political preferences, let´s spread knowledge, not rumor.
It is also important to understand that the Mormon church has a policy of neutrality regarding politics. So the Mormon/Republican thing is strictly a cultural thing. We do not discuss politics except in very broad terms in church meetings and are not encouraged to vote for any political party.
To those who think that I am on the brink of outer darkness trying to pass myself off as a good Mormon while being a Democrat I say this: Until there is a temple recommend question asking me if I vote Democrat, I will assume that I can be considered an equally worthy member of the Mormon church as any Republican who is trying their best to the right thing and voting their conscience. I also assume that the church would take a strong stand against a candidate if they believed they were into "killing babies". So I am going to trust my Prophet that it is ok that I am a Democrat and would thank my fellow church members to do the same.
Like most people I know in this country, I don't consider myself especially well versed in political matters, I do my best to know what I need to know but I do not make politics my hobby.
Unlike most people in this country, I have the point of view of someone who did not grow up here. This meant that I did not have my American political leanings shaped or influenced by any one in any way. I had no idea Mormons were "supposed" to be Republicans or that they were more righteous then Democrats :P So when I got here as a young adult and I wanted to figure out which party I most supported, I relied only on my personal, religious and moral convictions to make that decision. I studied the scriptures to make those decisions.
Here are some of the convictions I have reached:
On Taxes
1. I believe that we should help others as much as we can. I don't believe that what I earn is my God-given right to keep. I don't believe in the "I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and so can they" theory. I think, quite frankly that this is judgmental garbage. You did well because you worked hard (maybe) and you were lucky (for sure). How can I say that? This is how. Give me one person who is making over 60K a year and I will show them 10 who make less then of half that and work a heck of a lot harder then they do, people who can't heat their homes. So that argument holds zero weight with me, and I just find it very uncompassionate, closed minded and arrogant. Maybe because I grew up in South Africa and I saw how hard some people worked and how little they have. and will always have. This "I worked hard so you can too and be just as well off as I am" is just not realistic. I don't believe that I should be able to be rich at the expense of other people. I have no problem with people becoming successful and independently wealthy. I hope to be myself one day, I like to think I could do a lot of good with some money, but I don't view it as my inalienable right to have more then you do or to hoard it to give to my kids one day. At the end of the day, you can't take it with you so if it comes down to helping others or being rich, I'm going to invest in helping others. I am aware that not all Mormon Republicans hold this view, I'm just saying that this is an argument I am frequently given for their views.
I believe that what we have is not ours at all actually. According to my religion all we have been given is a gift from God and we are commanded to share it. The Mormon scripture upon which I base my belief is found here: 24 And again, I say unto the poor, ye who have not and yet have sufficient, that ye remain from day to day; I mean all you who deny the beggar, because ye have not; I would that ye say in your hearts that: I agive not because I bhave not, but if I had I would cgive. Mosiah 4:24
One of the many Biblical scriptures on the matter:
4 He shall judge the poor of the people, he shall save the children of the needy, and shall break in pieces the aoppressor.
• • •
12 For he shall deliver the needy when he crieth; the poor also, andhim that hath no helper.
13 He shall spare the poorandneedy, and shall save the souls of the needy.
On the much recently maligned matter of "spreading the wealth" I cannot for the life of me figure out why this is referred to in such horror and disgust. Funny, I was always under the impression that Christians (and particularly Mormons) believed in that:
2 Cor. 8: 14 But by an equality, that now at this time your abundance may be a supply for their want, that their abundance also may be a supply for your want: that there may be equality:
4 Ne. 1: 3 (Also Acts 2: 44; Acts 4: 32-37; 3 Ne. 26: 19; ) And they had all things common among them; therefore there were not rich and poor, bond and free, but they were all made free, and partakers of the heavenly gift.
Moses 7: 18 And the Lord called his people Zion, because they were of one heart and one mind, and dwelt in righteousness; and there was no poor among them.
The main Republican argument I have heard regarding taxation is this: Republicans believe that taxing people to support welfare programs or any program help those who are in need, violates our free agency. They believe that we should help others according to our conscience. That the Big Government should stay out of it. Since Mormons voluntarily give 10% of their gross incomes in tithes and an additional amount in fast and other offerings each month, they can argue that they would choose to give voluntarily as they saw fit, without the government telling them to. Fine, I can't tell you you wouldn't, but I do want to point out that the vast majority of the country do not give 10% of their incomes as a charitable donation and I don't think that the welfare programs could be run by just those who are inclined to pay tithing (Mormon or otherwise) or even by those who are inclined to make even significant charitable donations. I believe we all have to do our part to help the less fortunate and to run our country efficiently and that has to be regulated in some way. Just like tithing.
All that aside, if you are going to use the "give me my free agency, go away Big Government" argument, I still have a really hard time understanding why the same people who feel that the Government should have a say over who marries whom, the issue of abortion, and the doling out of the Death Penalty, don't also believe the Government should have a say in how we as a nation help those less fortunate then ourselves. To me it is like saying "How dare the government regulate how we take care of the teacher who educates our children, as well as it does the Oil Tycoon! But they'd better make sure they have total control over who has an abortion!"
This is a glaring inconsistency to me and try as I might, I have never been able to wrap my mind around it. How can one be willing to allow the Government to be "big" enough to further your moral agenda, but not willing to let it be "big" enough to protect and help the least of this nation's people. I don't get it.
The Christian in me believes that "where much is given, much is required." This is what Progressive taxation means to me. Many Republicans like to call Progressive Taxation da da daaaaaaummmmhm..... Socialism. Especially lately. .It's become the big scary (why so scary, I don't get that either?) buzz word and lots of people are throwing the term da..da...dummmmmm "socialism" about with gay abandon. Before they do that too much more, I think they should research socialism to find out how different it is from Progressive Taxation. They are not one and the same.
And while we are on the topic of "socialism" (eeeeek!!!) here's how consistent John McCain has been on that issue over the years. It seems he used to believe in Progressive Taxation (aka socialism in McCain 2008's world), quite strongly himself That is until he was able to twist it into a smear on Obama and rename it socialism. No really, you should see this. Really John? Wouldn't that be da da daaaaahm..EEEK....."spreading the wealth??" Again, I was always kind of under the impression that Jesus wanted us to do that. (See the above scriptures again.)
On purely selfish economic grounds, Obama's tax plan will result in me and pretty much everyone I know getting a major tax cut, far bigger then the one McCain is offering. And heck man, I can use it!! (Speaking of which, if I know you and you are making enough money that you will come out ahead with McCain's tax plan, please email me immediately so that we can talk about you giving me a job as your maid or something ;)
Not only this, Obama's health care plan will also put the average American family ahead by about $2500. I'm not going to sneeze at that. Haha, get the pun, man I slay me.
Let's move onto the horrible topic of Abortion.
I am in the business of birth. I feel that I am on sacred ground when I attend a birth. One of the reasons why I became a doula was so that I could have that spiritual experience more often and that I could help the expectant parents to be able to focus on the sacred aspects of that experience. I help pregnant mothers to have as healthy babies and as meaningful pregnancies as possible. I do not believe life begins at birth.
I also support a pro-Choice candidate. This makes me a baby-killing monster according to some. Yes, I think that is pretty ignorant and judgmental too. Whatever.
Here's the thing, people who are pro-choice are not automatically pro-Abortion. Many of them abhor abortion. I am personally repulsed by abortion. Just typing the word sort of sickens me. Which is why I would like it to happen a lot less often. Which is why I am willing to get off my high moral horse to support programs that I believe will actually lower the incident of abortion. I'm practical that way. (And I say get off my high moral horse because I used to be on one before I actually studied this issue a bit).
And let's be clear about one thing. Legalizing abortion will in no way ever make it an acceptable birth control option for me. Pre-marital sex is legal too, drinking and smoking are legal too. I don't support those things. As a Christian himself, I don't believe Obama takes the idea of abortion lightly either. At all.
Let me reiterate this one. more. time. : I don't want abortion to happen. There are cases when it is necessary to save the life of the mother, but like I'm sure pretty much everyone else, I want there to be as few abortions happening as possible.
I strongly believe that abortion destroys lives. Studies show that apart from the fact that an innocent life is lost, women have a harder time emotionally recovering from having abortions then they do any other trauma. I have been to great lengths and spent much emotional energy to share this message with others, fervently praying that they would not make this decision . But making abortion illegal will not, in my opinion (and according to quite a lot of scientific research), lower the incident of abortions. It will definitely though, result in more unsafe abortions where the mother's life has a good chance of being lost as well.
I believe when programs are put into place where women and girls who may be considering this awful option can go, to speak to trained professionals and understand what it really means, and what it will do to their life, that the incidence of abortion would be lowered. I also believe more programs (funded by our tax dollars) will go towards counseling programs which will increase the number of women who choose the adoption option, something that is so often not even considered by women carrying unwanted pregnancies. Adoption is something I believe is a great blessing. I can't think of anything better then spending my tax dollars so that good loving parents will have an easier time adopting babies. Heck yeah, spread my wealth all you want over that.
Once again, according McCain/Palin we should have our free agency regarding who we share our money with, but nobody, not even women who have been raped or victims of incest, should be allowed the agency to make that choice about her body? I disagree, and the leaders of my Church do too.
While it is clear that the LDS church takes a tough stance on abortion, they do acknowledge circumstances when a women who has been properly counseled, and engaged in earnest prayer, should be able to make that decision for herself.
One last word on this topic. I humbly request that if you are in the habit of telling your children that Barack Obama (or I, by virtue of supporting him) kills babies, please stop. That is just not true and I think you know it. I consider it slanderous at best and extremely offensive. Obama has never participated in an abortion.
It also strikes me as ironic that I hear this line a lot from conservative NRA supporters who are so fond of the slogan, "guns don't kill people, people kill people". By supporting the free agency that so many Republicans hold so dear as long as it pertains to tax, Barack Obama does not kill babies. People make their own decisions where that is concerned. The war.
I strongly believe that George W.Bush and his advisers rode the wave of the horror and anger after 9-11 to start a war that furthered agendas and vendettas which had no connection to 9-11. They took advantage of a country in shock and pain and got them to support a war they (Bush and co) had been wanting for a long time.
I cannot support a candidate who will continue the tragedy of this deception, and who will allow even more innocent people on both sides to die, who will sacrifice the lives of our loyal soldiers for the sake of "victory". I don't believe there ever will be true "victory" for the perpetrators of a war of aggression.
Finally, I support Barack Obama because to me he represents the most Christ-like of the two individuals. He refrains from sarcasm, anger and eye rolling and is capable of being respectful when he addresses his fellow candidate. Barack Obama has shown himself to be even-keeled, calm and consistent in his bearing and behaviour, even under extreme duress and false personal attacks so vicious that they have been denounced by people in the party opposing him.
The same can not be said of McCain. Republicans themselves admit that he is angry and volatile. But , they tell me, they like this! Maybe the "fire in his belly" will be a good thing, motivate him to bring about make some real change.
I disagree. Again, on the basis of my religion. I don't believe anger or contention ever solve things, they merely beget even more anger and contention. Something we cannot afford. Jesus was very clear on this matter. “He that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another. Behold, this is not my doctrine, to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another; but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away” (3 Nephi 11:29–30).
I don't want someone as full of rage as McCain, or as reckless in riling up a crowd to murderous anger as Sarah Palin, negotiating with people who aren't feeling good about us to start with. I would far prefer someone with a calm and calming demeanour take on that task. I would rather someone whose demeanour allowed them to be led by the Spirit, take on that task.
From the international perspective again, I can tell you that having Obama elected to office will go a very long way towards restoring the view the world has of America.
The environment. I believe it is our stewardship and we have been commanded to care for it prudently. I don't believe that John McCain or Sarah Palin place very much priority on this charge and disregard good Science which points to why this is very dangerous.
I am done (for now). You are free to disagree with me, but when you do, please consider that I came to these convictions through personal study and prayer. They are strictly myopinions, I do not represent other Mormon Democrats or anyone other then my very own little self.
If you read this truly epic post, I truly appreciate it. Particularly if you aren't a Democrat. I think that shows admirable open-mindedness. It took a lot of work and thought on my part, and frankly it takes quite a bit of courage to post it. I have no interest in getting into a political fight with anyone, I have no interest in contentious confrontation but respectful discussion..always.
I hope that if you choose to leave an angry or ugly comment, that you will consider your motivation for doing so. If it is because you think I undermine your Christian values, then you should consider if you are being Christ-like in the way you address me and my personal beliefs or not. Again, you are free to disagree but I will not publish anonymous comments or any comments I deem inappropriate, vulgar or hateful. That includes anything that calls Obama a baby-killer. Fah gosh sakes.
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